Authenticity

Being true to ourselves sometimes is as much an act of grief as it is courage. When we find ourselves coming from a place that is off center, we sense we are losing something inside ourselves. We become less connected to who we actually are and we feel more blown around by changing circumstances around us. We may modify ourselves to be liked by others, and at times this may pull us away from what we truly value. Giving up what may be accepted by others to be true to ourselves takes tremendous courage. Being authentic sometimes means we stand alone. We fear being isolated, even rejected by some. Being oneself at the risk of loosing others may bring to the surface that perhaps these relationships are not based on a solid foundation to begin with. The alternative however is to make ourselves small, to shapeshift and morph ourselves into something we are not, and loose connection with ourself in the process. Or what’s worse is to act out of alignment with who we know ourselves to be and end up disrespecting ourselves and others.

Becoming more authentic is an ongoing practice to attune more deeply within. It sometimes means hearing hard truths from trusted loved ones, of our shadow reflected back to us, and an honest reflection of work we have to do. Being true to oneself is not only a practice of sunshine. To be fully human, we must also embrace the wholeness of who we are, which includes our shadow. As humans we are capable of causing tremendous harm; to ourselves, one another and the earth. We see evidence of harm in world events, in the media, when we go about our daily lives, and if we are honest with ourselves, in the mirror. Being authentic means taking a good look at all of who we are, with the shiny and the shadow.

Many of the people I work with, both in therapy and clinical supervision, speak about ways they come to see themselves more clearly when they are out in nature. Going out alone to natural settings can be calming, it can call us to gain perspective, and can remind us of the world outside ourselves. In nature we can process how we truly feel, attune to the insight our bodies may already be telling us about what we know is right, and find a safe space to do this work. Attuning to our authenticity is courageous work can be an ongoing practice we integrate. As we learn to listen more deeply to our own inner knowing, we find our way back to ourselves, more fully and wholeheartedly. We learn and grow as we do, and the relationships we build from this place are the ones to keep and foster.

Sending you blessings of courage and a commitment to rediscovering yourself again.

Sincerely,

Melissa

“The more wild the nature, the more human I feel.”